I am surrounded by brilliant people.
And I suppose, I always have been.
I know it’s stupid to compare myself to other people, but I feel like it’s a natural tendency and it’s hard to stop doing it.
I look at my friends with better GPAs and likeable personalities
and see them struggling to get into medical school
and I can’t help but think
if they’re having trouble getting in, how could I possibility?
On one hand, they’re motivating me to try harder (though I’m unsure if this motivation is actually working).
On the other hand, it’s depressing (perhaps this is countering the motivation?).
It’s hard keep the thoughts out of my head:
I’m not good enough.
They are better than you.
But I know that thinking that way will only move me further from my goal.
So I mustn’t compare myself to anyone but myself.
I must shift the comparisons I’m making from out to within. I know I should be worrying about how I’m going to improve rather than thinking about how much there is improve.
I know I shouldn’t, but I still do.
I don’t do it often, but it sneaks its way into my head from time to time.
I think it’s just something I have to accept.
Maybe I just need to shift from “I’m not as good as them” to “They’re better so I can be better too”.
I think I can do that.
I know I can.